There’s a place for psychology, for medicine, and for self-care. There’s even a place for emotional-support bagels. There are times when kvetching with friends for a few minutes over a cup of tea is all you need to set your heart at ease. But there are also occasions when our anxiety runs deeper than all that.

Modern psychology and medicine have developed many tools to help us deal with our more pervasive stressors. And God knows we need tools!

Especially this year, we have plenty to be anxious about. David Wolpe, a leading member of the Anti-Defamation League, wrote about the fear that Jewish people worldwide have been experiencing since last October 7. In a personal reflection, he said, “Never in my nearly 40 years as a rabbi have I heard so many expressions of despair from the Jewish community.”1 To put it simply, it’s been a hard year.

When Jesus walked among us, he was familiar with hard years. He had a fully immersive human experience. He got hungry and tired. He was betrayed by his friends. He mourned the suffering of his fellow man. And he lived through the Roman occupation of the Land—a time of unparalleled oppression of our people.

So, Jesus was no stranger to hurt or stress. But in the midst of it, he showed us how to seek shalom (inner peace):

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. (John 14:27)2

Jesus’ words hint that there would be something limited about any kind of peace the world could offer. If our anxieties run deep, then we need a solution that runs deep too. Peace was not so much a goal he was urging us to achieve, but rather a gift that he was offering.

Here are some of the ways he did that.

He Shared Our Burdens

There are documented moments3 in Jesus’ life as an itinerant rabbi and movement leader where he got tired and burnt out. He spent most of his time dealing with needy crowds of people who begged for healing, hung onto his words of wisdom, or came out to challenge him. So, sometimes, he just needed to get away from it all and pray alone.

Jesus was no stranger to ethnically and politically based persecution.

On the night before Jesus was put on trial, he took his disciples to pray with him. He knew that he would soon face persecution.

And he withdrew from them about a stone’s throw, and knelt down and prayed, saying, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.”… And being in agony he prayed more earnestly; and his sweat became like great drops of blood falling down to the ground. (Luke 22:41–44)4

Jesus was no stranger to ethnically and politically based persecution. He faced execution at the hand of first-century Israel’s Gentile oppressors, and the charge they nailed above his head was “King of the Jews.”

Later, a New Testament writer would say that Jesus is able to sympathize with all our weaknesses because he experienced them himself.5 And his bravery and emotional honesty through it all showed us that there’s always more to hope for.

You Are Worth More

When Jesus asked us to let go of worry, he gave us something powerful to hold on to instead. That’s the understanding of our own intrinsic value, a value that’s been given by the God who made us.

Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. (Matthew 10:29–31 NIV, emphasis added)

So many of us have learned from an early age that our worth depended on performance. And those messages might only be confirmed by working and living in the world. (Are you smart, pretty, charming, or rich enough for people to care about you?) Yet here, Jesus says that we have worth simply because we belong to God and He values us.

The sparrows haven’t done anything to earn God’s care (they don’t seem like big contributors to society). And yet here, Jesus asserts that the Father sees each one that falls to the ground. He sees you, too.

The Truth Heals

There was once a woman who was brought before Jesus in a state of utter shame and embarrassment. Some religious leaders caught her in the act of adultery, and then dragged her out into the middle of the town in broad daylight. In front of everyone, they asked Jesus what they should do with her.

Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” … [T]hey went away one by one, beginning with the older ones, and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him. Jesus stood up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.” (John 8:6–11)

He knew what to do with someone fragile. He saw this unnamed woman in her lowest moment, but did not condemn her. Instead, he showed her mercy and convinced the crowd to show her mercy as well by reminding them that we have all broken God’s law at some point. Then, in gentleness, he urged her to go and live a healthy life. We don’t know what happened to her after her meeting with Jesus, but I imagine that when she left that conversation, her steps were much lighter and her head held higher than when she’d entered it.

By itself, therapy can’t guarantee us ultimate forgiveness and inclusion.

There are many ways that modern psychology and counseling have found to help people move towards forgiveness, whether that’s forgiveness of self or of others. And that kind of therapy can be helpful for bringing relationships closer to restoration. But by itself, therapy can’t truly heal our deep-down knowledge of our own past failures or guarantee us ultimate forgiveness and inclusion.6

We Are Each Other’s Keepers

Jesus led his disciples well. When he sent them out to minister, he didn’t send them alone. “And he called the twelve and began to send them out two by two” (Mark 6:7). He knew that they would need one another for physical and emotional support.

This reminds me of a core Jewish value: We are responsible for one another. As My Jewish Learning puts it, “The sense that the community is responsible for the physical and communal needs of its members has manifested itself in different ways throughout Jewish history.”7

Though “belonging” seems like a trendy word now, it’s not a new idea. Jewish wisdom, the Old Testament, and the New Testament are in agreement: Life is best lived in community. So, if you feel compelled to check on a friend or to reach out for help yourself? There’s a precedent for that.

Jesus also modeled how a caring community can look when his students were exhausted from ministering to the crowds of people who’d followed them. “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest” (Mark 6:31 NIV), he urged them.

Lay Your Burdens Down

It might seem strange, but sometimes the answer to the burden you’re carrying is to lay it down.

In my own journey of recovery from post-traumatic stress, I found that sometimes the weight of trying to “fix everything” was too heavy. The greatest peace actually came in recognizing that—in laying my burdens down and just following the words and life of Jesus.

I think that’s what he meant when he said:

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. (Matthew 11:28–29)

And he meant that we can always come to him. It’s true that some burdens can be lifted in a moment. But when burdens of life remain, he carries the weight of them for us—as we learn to walk with him one day at a time. He cares for us better than we can care for ourselves.

What happens when my lack of self-care becomes one more thing to beat myself up about?

Self-care and other ways of pursuing our health are critical. But there can be seasons in life when our schedules or bank accounts just won’t allow us to pursue those good things. What do we do when the list of things we need to do to take care of ourselves is so long that it actually provokes more anxiety? What happens when my lack of self-care becomes just one more thing to beat myself up about? Maybe it’s time to try something else.

The moments when we realize we don’t have it all together and we don’t have to have it all together can be the most freeing. Ultimately, those moments of surrender can provide the greatest moments of healing.

He Sees You

Near the end of the New Testament, the risen Jesus sent a message to the disciples telling them that those who persevere in faith will be given a white stone with a name written on it that is only known to the person and God. In other words, God has a name and a purpose for you that even you do not know yet. And it’s part of His plan for the renewal of the whole world.

There’s an expectation in the Hebrew Scriptures, too, that one role of the Messiah is to renew our broken world. One day, we will see what that mission looks like completed. But until then, he promises to renew a broken you and a broken me with his love.

It’s a journey to find out what that looks like. A big part of that journey is developing a relationship with him. Dutch theologian Henri Nouwen put it this way:

Many voices ask for our attention. There is a voice that says, “Prove that you are a good person.” Another voice says, “You’d better be ashamed of yourself.” There also is a voice that says, “Nobody really cares about you,” and one that says, “Be sure to become successful, popular, and powerful.” But underneath all these often very noisy voices is a still, small voice that says, “You are my Beloved, my favor rests on you.” That’s the voice we need most of all to hear.8

Holding on to Jesus’ words can be a big part of what helps us grow towards greater emotional and mental stability. Life’s stressors might always be at the door. But shalom can be with us, too, when we remember and believe his words.

Endnotes

1. David Wolpe, “A year of anxiety and anguish for the Jewish people,” America, October 7, 2024.
2. When Jesus says, “My peace I leave with you,” he uses the Greek word aphiemi, which is used as a legal bequest or legacy instruction. In other words, it’s Jesus’ dying wish that we would know that peace in the midst of all the potential anxieties that could destroy our sanity.
3. See the Gospels (New Testament biographies of Jesus).
4. This very rare condition that Jesus experienced is called hematidrosis. It indicates an anguish so unsupportable that the body literally sweats blood. See the Wikipedia definition for more.
5. “For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin” (Hebrews 4:15).
6. For one of Jesus’ most famous parables on forgiveness, see Luke 18:10–14. You can find this and other New Testament references on biblehub.com.
7. Rabbi Jill Jacobs, “The Importance of the Community (Kehillah) in Judaism,” My Jewish Learning, accessed 10/29/24.
8. Henri Nouwen, Bread for the Journey: A Daybook of Wisdom and Faith(New York: HarperCollins, 1997), 13.