THE COMMENT: They’re crazy.”

OUR RESPONSE: So why try to refute the obvious?

THE COMMENT: “Their religion can’t he true. If they really are doing what God wants them to do, how come my daughter, who is one of them, isn’t married yet?”

OUR RESPONSE: Moishe has not yet come up with an answer that is satisfactory to both the daughter and the mother involved in this accusation.

THE COMMENT: “Their tactics alienate the Jews and turn them off, whereas we just go into the synagogue and the Jewish community and win friends.”

OUR RESPONSE: If we tried that tactic, we would be called sneaky and deceptive.

THE COMMENT: “They were excommunicated by a rabbinical court.”

OUR RESPONSE: True, but that court was excommunicated by another rabbinical court.

THE COMMENT: “Gaylord Gartman, the purchasing agent at Jews for Jesus Headquarters, recently proposed that they buy a train of 15 cars to be used as mobile offices to accommodate the mobile evangelistic teams.”

OUR RESPONSE: It’s not true, but he has been thinking about it.….

THE COMMENT: “The purchasing agent has requested the acquisition of a building ‘for training’—where he can lay out the tracks for his Canadian Pacific N gauge model train.”

OUR RESPONSE: This is also false. Gaylord would rather move the accounting department out on the sidewalk and serve them coffee and donuts, thus disguising the operation as a cafe. Then he could have the entire indoor accounting space for setting up his model trains.

THE COMMENT: “They are unkempt.”

OUR RESPONSE: We can’t deny that allegation because the page with that word fell out of our dictionary, and we don’t know what it means.

THE COMMENT: “They are irreverent and lazy.”

OUR RESPONSE: Moishe said that indeed, sometimes some of them are!